Sunday, February 8, 2009

I'm. So. Tired.

Fatigue is one those symptoms that is completely intangible. You can't always recognize it, but MSers always feel it. Of course everyone experiences fatigue. No one is immune to it and as we age we all fatigue more easily (one of the many joys of getting older!)

MS fatigue is hard to explain and like nothing I have ever known. I am slowly starting to learn my own signals and symptoms of it, though I am told that it can differ greatly from MSer to MSer. Have you ever had the nightmare where you are trying to run and simply can't? Or you can run but only in a weird slow motion-molasses type of run? MS fatigue is kinda like that - Dr. Thrower describes it as "trying to walk through a swimming pool while wearing a fur coat"!! ha!

You want to walk at a normal pace, and yet your legs will just not cooperate. You will them to move and its as if the signal just takes longer to get to them and finally they cooperate, but only in Molasses-Mode. Other things stop cooperating too. Your feet don't pick up off the ground as easily (the clinical name is "Foot-Drop"), your hands become weak and you find yourself dropping things more often, even having trouble grasping things like pens and your toothbrush. I always know I am drastically out of "spoons" when can't hold my housekey well enough to maneuver it into the front door lock and it takes me more than 3 tries to get the stupid key in and then turn it! I have learned to laugh at myself when this happens and then I head straight into the house and straight into my pajamas for bed!

MS fatigue doesn't play by the rules. Sometimes a night's sleep returns you back to "normal". Sometimes you wake up after a perfect night's sleep and feel like your body has been pumped full of lead. This morning was one of those mornings. My sweet husband finally convinced me to take some provigil and that seemed to help a little. We think that my body is just adjusting to the new medication and its hard work getting used to it.

Oh! I started Copaxone last Tuesday. I have high hopes that it will work for me, though getting my body used to a new drug is a slow, painful process. Hopefully 7-10 days I will be as good as new. It is still a sub-cutaneous injection (aka little needle) but I have to do it every day. Also its crucial to rotate injection sites and I have to have 7 sites that I use. So I assigned each site a different day of the week: right on Wed, left leg on Mon, etc. I even made up a mini-dance routine so that I would remember which day goes with which body part! hahaha!
Maybe if I get inspired I will put my Copaxone dance on youtube!!

3 comments:

Moe said...

Thanks for such a great description on what MS Fatigue feels like :)!

There are random days when folks in my office have asked if I was out on a bender the night before, gotta love dark circles and tired expressions.

Ps: I've been on copaxone for almost two years, and I have to say that my treatment has been successful. This past summer was the first in three years I did not have a relapse. SO here's hoping it works for you too.

EMBA-MOT said...

Caroline,

It was great meeting you and your family last night! Good luck with the copaxone!

Stacy Gensler

Angela said...

Caroline!! I wanted to let you know that I read your blog because I want to know more about what you are going through with MS. As an "outsider" it is hard to imagine what you are faced with and I think you are so strong and inspiring! I am really looking forward to our "tea time" tomorrow, I need it more than ever and I always look forward to seeing you! :o) xoxo Angela