This will be short. i'm sorry. Also i am about 5 days behind on returning emails/phone calls in general and i'm sorry for that too!
Last sunday i mentioned the dizziness/balance issues, which i thought were no big deal but yesterday afternoon the dizziness got alot worse and was accompanied by searing pain in my right arm. i have a pretty high pain threshold i think, but dude-this pain ranks a solid 3rd under spinal tap and root canal. like a knife lit on fire stabbing your arm repeatedly bring tears to your eyes sorta pain. :-( not pleasant. as the day went on i could not walk to the bathroom without holding on to the walls because the room was spinning and moving out of control.
needless to say i called shepherd. they basically said they could not consider it a "relapse" unless the new symptoms have lasted 48 hrs or more. So I have been maxing out on lyrica and baclofen and walking into walls and seriously considering taking some of that leftover percoset from my surgery last year!! it has been 24 hrs. if things dont improve by tomorrow afternoon then i call my dr and see what he wants to do? i guess?
i am a little scared and alot frustrated. the other day i was just thinking about what i wanted to do for my one yr MS anniversary...i thought i should do something really fun and upbeat and happy on a day that holds awful sad memories. ya know...show the MonSter who's boss and that it cannot ruin any day of the year for me gosh darnnit. but it never ever occured to me that i might have a second "relapse" in my first year of living with MS. i guess it should have. but i just wanted to be optimistic and hope for the best. what else can you do?
"Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and when it occurs, hold your head high, look it squarely in the eye and say,'I will be bigger than you. You cannot defeat me.'" - Ann Landers
will try and update tomorrow afternoon/evening. and if you havent already, dont forget to support us in WalkMS. the possibility of this being a relapse makes me even more excited and ready to raise some serious dough to support MS research so we can tell the MonSter that it can and WILL be defeated.
I love you all.